Message by an unknown Spirit.
One of the first words that a child learns, in any language, is no. It is also one of the most used and heard, since infancy. In the animal kingdom, the instincts prevail and nothing else can be done unless saying yes, continuously, to the unstoppable impulses of survival that emerge, as commands of Nature for the preservation of the individuals and the perpetuation of the species. Entering into humanity, however, the idea and practice of denying something to someone or to oneself emerges as one of the most genuine form of manifestation of the power to perceive, to interpret and to make choices from the conclusions one has reached. Saying no is part of the essence of the human condition, and, why not to say it, one of the factors that better magnify or characterize the greatness of being free.
Learn how (or perfect your ability) to say no, especially in the field of your weaknesses. In this age of freedom that human civilization has plunged into, this is one of the greatest challenges to human conscience which, paradoxically, constitutes the excellence of free will. Having the power to refrain from is the greatest of all powers – the power over oneself.
Some precautions, however, should be taken to facilitate the complex process of self-overcoming and inner education:
- Completely avoid visiting places that have direct co-relation to your weakness.
- Avoid or even break ties with friends who lead you to vicious tendencies – with no remorse (People come along our way to teach us existential lessons. We need to let them go, when they have finished their mission in our lives.)
- Seek psychotherapeutic help or individual or group counselling, as well as support of family and loved ones to get out the vicious and self-destructive circle you have casted yourself into or allowed yourself to be swallowed by.
- Practice the art of saying no. Nothing will give you greater sensation of freedom and power over yourself.
- Improve yourself a little every day. Be radical with the non-negotiable and flexible with all manageable aspects of your vulnerability.
- Restart whenever you fall back on the same mistakes. Relapsing is a natural phenomenon, in the process of regaining control over oneself or acquiring the ability to manage oneself. Therefore, do not be disheartened when it happens. On the other hand, stop self-recrimination and check, practically and objectively, what measures can be taken to avoid slipping again, and apply them immediately. Over time, you will develop your own method, almost infallible, of self-control.
Finally, dear friend, trust to God your sincere efforts of self-correction. It is not always easy to start a new life with a new pattern of discipline. There will be moments where you will feel discouraged, up to the point of giving up, and worse of all: a part of you will wish that this happens. However, amid the turmoil of difficult times, extend the horizon of your thoughts; forget about the circumstances of the moment, forget the fleeting interests that accost you, and think of the implications, the long term consequences of your stingy or immature behaviour and you will easily find emotional fuel for your will to tame yourself.
Your weakness is your great master: of humility, self-discipline, indulgence, and continuous effort of self-transcendence. Thank God for its existence, learn to co-exist with it, without being dominated by it and nurture your childish, crazy or sick part, so that slowly you heal yourself, grow up and become something worthy, noble and just, as you originally are, as you can become even more, for your own sake, for the sake of those whom you love and all those who are in your direct or indirect circle of personal influence.
(Text received on May 17, 2001.)